I was never spectacular at focusing.
Most of the time in classes and conversation I found it much easier to let my mind wander than cram its attention into a single subject and pretend they were the most pressing thing.It's not that I didn't think they were important- if I did, I wouldn't be able to hide it on my face and they'd get disrespected or annoyed or say "you're an asshole, Peter" and I'd have one less stranger to worry about. It's because there's so much going on during a conversation to pay attention to any one thing. Yes, I love hearing all about your day, but is that car's license plate all vowels? I hear your concern about lead dishes in HomeGoods, but where are the fire exit signs? Your calves hurt after your morning jog? It's probably because you don't roll them or lower your running speed by increments before resting, but also, How much glass is in this room RIGHT NOW.
I've seen Harry meet people and look at them like breaking eye contact would result in being court marshaled, and it boggles me. I look at him, and I feel the envy you only get when you see someone eating something you're devastatingly allergic to. That "They can, and I just can't." vibe. The one that says, "They're built this way, and I'm not."
I'm not spectacular at focusing, but I get to swing through a city at close to 120 mph, (150 if I don't mind feeling 40% ruined slinky) save a metric crap-ton on subway fees, and nail a goon's gun 40 paces away with my eyes and nose blocked by what feels 20-grit military-grade beard stubble.
Trust me, it's harder than it looks.
But I think, as this gymshark brings his brachialis in what I could only consider intimate contact with my windpipe, and I pull on the stop sign above us to concuss Mr.Thugmufffin into next Tuesday, that this is who I am. webbing guns, sticking debris from explosions, and saving onlookers (who should be running) from being violently transitioned into closed casket funerals. Sure, I can't stare on a history book for more than an hour without a constant supply of skittles bribing my attention span, but Harry can't keep track of a group of 7 armed men while running up the side of an apartment, (avoid stepping on the windows) and creating a tether point that swings a pendulum (me, if you even care) out of the way of incoming gunfire.
he also can't eat soy-based protein, which, c'mon, isn't that the real tragedy?
The point is, we're built different. He's built to hold eye-contact and lead conferences in front of suits and ties that have a net worth that would make Midas touch himself. I'm built for saving the city. And it's because of that- because I've got this ability that nobody else can call their own, that I NEED to do this. Because everyone isn't like this. and I am. they can't, and I can.
I'm still not spectacular at focusing. I AM, however, a spectacular Spider-Man.